Listening to There's Nothing Worse Than Too Late by Real Friends and the song “Always Lose” is very much a theme song of mine.
I keep telling myself I can change, I can change
I keep lying cause I'm only saving face
Feels like I always lose
When I open up, I end up without you
How the fuck am I supposed to heal these wounds?
Black and blue, can't see through
Black and blue
Feels like I always lose
When I open up, I end up without you
And the song that follows it, “Six Feet,” is as well.
I'm barely breathing, barely getting by
It takes my lowest low for me to cross your mind
I don't wanna have to be six feet underground to feel loved
I don't wanna have to be a memory
To feel like I'm someone you thought of
When blues turn grey, we'll wither away
I don't wanna have to be six feet underground to feel loved
It's comforting for somebody else to feel the same way, I guess.
Day 1 of the heatwave was great. The humidity was tolerable and the warmth is so refreshing to step into. It helps that I have functional AC though, because where I used to live I did not and the house would get to 90 degrees. It was unbearable, and especially with having pets who are even more sensitive to it than I am (thanks POTS).
I haven't practiced guitar because of fresh tattoos, I am gonna try it on Wednesday to see if it feels okay. I hope so.
I have started this thing over like 6 times. I just end up going so long between posts that it feels disjointed and I want to start fresh to keep things consistent... I'm just really bad at the whole being consistent thing.
I have a migraine and it's Friday. I hate it when they overlap with the weekend, and it seems to happen more often than not. I really wish they had a cure because it's always such an ordeal to try to function through them.
At least it happened to me this weekend instead of next weekend when all the fireworks are going to be off for hours.